MCHONGOANO

And here's some Mchongoano that I was sent to recently through E-mail. Joan Waswa, you are simply the best.

1. Computer yenu ni oldschool hadi anti-virus yake hutumia mawe kudestroy viruses.
2. Kwenu nyinyi ni wezi kupindukia hadi Ali Baba and the 40 thieves walicome attacho kwenu.
3. Ati ndoto zako ni noma mpaka zo huanza..Previously on.....
4. Naskia kwenu mumeendelea hadi mko na teabags za uji
5. Wewe ni mweusi ikishika mtoi anadoz akidhani ni usiku
6. Umezoea kutuma please call me hadi waizi wakikam unda-dial *130*911#
7. We ni mang'aa hata ulikataa kuzaliwa uchi
8. Ati jogoo wenu ni mlazy, wa neighbour akiwika morning wenu ansema...SAME!
9.Kwenyu muko wengi mpaka paro wanawaita mafans
10. Ati dogi yenu imeokoka hadi wezi wakikam kwenu inasema "iba tu lakini mungu anakuona"
11. Umesota mpaka ukiweka bamba 50 kwa simu yako inavibrate siku mbili in shock
12. Ati una kichwa soo, siku uta die coffin yako itakuwa na shape ya lollipop!
13. Shingo yako ndefu mpaka iko na elbow!
14. Kwenu hamnaga vikombe, so nyinyi hukunywanga chai na sponge
15.Kwenu nyi ni wengi mpaka wengine wanaitwa 'enough is enough'